Novo by Night

Novosibirsk, the capital of Siberia, was originally called Novonikolaevsk, after Nicholas II, the last Emperor of Russia. (Interestingly, it was renamed in 1926 "by the demand of the working people" to Novosibirsk, New Siberia, because all the great revolutionary names had already been used up -- Leningrad, Stalingrad, etc). At over two million people, it is the largest city in Russian Asia and either the third or fourth largest city in the country, depending on who you consult.The census is not a national priority as it is in the United States).

Home of a majestic opera and ballet, the largest such building in all of Russia, Novosibirsk is simultaneously laid back and bustling. I attempted to eat at a place called the New York Times, they even had an english menu so that I knew exactly what kind of carnage I could not eat. Settled on a beer and some grilled vegetables and, judging from the clump of hair that came out this morning, its probably high time to find a protein source. Next door, on Vokzalnaya Ulitsa, is the Alpen Grot, a dingy sort of subterranean bar that, for some reason, beckoned me. I walked in just before midnight which means, here and seemingly in all Russian bars, its time for the strip show!

Now, as good as it sounds to watch naked Russians run around on stage, they do it real different over here. The dancers definitely consider themselves artistes over entertainers, the intricate choreography alone gives that away, and to make matters worse, it is always mixed gender. The number of naked men I've seen in Russia will last me a lifetime, thank you. In the United States, there is no way you'd ever see straight men watching male strippers, but here it is very common. And in a country teeming with lovely women, it is strange indeed to observe them watching less beautiful versions prancing around on stage, barely wearing less clothing. What is this, Bizarro World? In that case, bad-bye!